Building self esteem is one of the steps to happiness and a life you enjoy more. If you have low confidence or low self esteem you will find it impossible to be the person you could be and your happiness will be limited. Self esteem increases your confidence. If you have confidence you will respect yourself and then you can respect others, improve your relationships and become happier. This is not a selfish goal as you will contribute more and share yourself with the world and those around you.
Some people come into my practice and they believe that they have a low self esteem. How did they found out? They started to search for information in books, on the internet and by watching programs on tv. Everything they have searched for confirmed exactly what they felt, but during the coaching process we found out that there was something else going on. In reality the coachee wasn’t given the space, time and recognition of his capabilities by his caretakers and therefore he couldn’t develop himself to be a happy adult. Especially when there is another child or children involved who need more care, then it is possible that the caretakers don’t divide their attention with the consequence that a child could feel neglected.
Children have their own fighting mechanism, so during childhood it could seem that everything is fine with the child, but as an adolescent growing up to be an adult the person can go through difficult stages because of experiences in childhood. The following example illustrates a positive attitude towards an infant who is discovering his body: What are you doing there in the corner with your toys Michael? a mother asks her 4 year old. I am rubbing with my willy against the truck. That’s is nice: Yes, that’s right, my darling. Does your willy get bigger? Yes, mom, look! Michael takes his pants off en shows his erection. Oh yes, I see now. Well, that’s nice? Do you want a cookie?
The mother in the example doesn’t feel ashamed by the situation and therefore she won’t label the action with her own limiting beliefs. The child is blessed with the attitude of his mother, because as an adult he will be able to enjoy in general, his own body and especially his sexuality. I could give you thousands of tips to build your self esteem, but the only tip I would like to give you is to take the dive into what really limits you to feel self confident. All the other tips you can find searching through every available media channel! 🙂