Recently I spoke to a highly sensitive lady and she said: ‘Don’t tell me to do a daily meditation or mindfulness. This doesn’t work for me. I have tried so many different forms of personal development. Now I want to feel a change.’
What she first needed was to understand how she came to see herself as a highly sensitive introvert and how essential it was for her to go her own way instead of searching for her mother’s approval and understanding. (Almost on a daily basis)
As a kid she grew up with a little sister who turned into a troublemaker. (And not for no reason) She was the bigger sister and did all she could to be of no trouble at all to her mother. When they spoke they mostly spoke about their family situation. Her innerlife was intertwined with her mom’s innerlife. She grew up by keeping her mouth shut about how she felt. Instead she focussed on her schoolwork.
She could’t be more motivated because after the introduction session she started practising immediately. Instead of discussing her inner life with her mom she talked to her boyfriend and a good friend. She said: ‘It wasn’t as satisfying as talking to my mom, because she is the one who understands me best. But I know it’s good for me. I don’t want to depend on her opinion.’
She felt a change. She felt stronger from within, but also dealt with guilt. It was still kind of awkward, but she was still motivated.
And no, I won’t tell her to do meditation if that doesn’t work for her. What works for her was putting her new found insights about herself into practice.
If this sounds like a I-want-to-feel-better-about-myself-plan to you, just send me an e-mail to book your introduction session or follow-up session.
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