Online Interviews with beautiful and inspiring people

I’ve been doing these Online Interviews via videoskype after 3 weeks into the corona-crisis. This photo is with Hubertine Langemeijer, @kunstpost, a dear friend of mine and director of “Stichting Kunstpost”. She rents out work spaces for an affordable price to artists and is always busy with organizing social projects.

During the first weeks I didn’t have the emotional nor mental space to work on the creative projects I had already started. I switched to survival mode. More time and energy went out to contacting clients about how to continue and I felt anxious because my life partner’s income vanished into the open air.

Peace and quiteness returned because most of my work continued and slowly @arnoldbalde received other work opportunities. However most of my clients continued, new requests for coaching & rebirthing have been on a freeze for 7 weeks. That’s why I still wasn’t calmn enough to pick up my creative projects.

Than suddenly the idea came to me to do these Online Interviews. For years I have been telling my clients to share their story and talents with more people. Starting with the people around them to let it evolve into something more. The idea with these Online Interviews is that they can do this through me!

I speak to former and current clients, work relationships in the field of coaching and psychology and artists about working from the heart, art and creative processes and personal development.

This project feels like an ungoing one. It’s definitely part of my mission to put forward all these beautiful people with their innate talents and ideas about life. My motivation is to inspire people to take action.

A story that touches your soul, heart and mind is able to ignite just that what you need to move forward in your life.

With Com-Passion,
Chungmei Cheng

Be who you are, not who the world wants you to be
Website: Orchid of Life ~ HSP Coaching & Rebirthing

Balancing between work and parenthood

January has come to and end. What a ride it was. About work…I’ve decided to work less hours in terms of guiding sessions. The space that will open up because of this decision goes into creating video’s and (e)books about my work. Working less is also strongly related to my youngest starting primary school. 

Recently I gave a lecture on high sensitivity and spiritual love relationships. A few months ago I decided to put this topic on my agenda. It was an impulse, a strong need to put Love on the map. As I was preparing myself for the lecture in bits and pieces I noticed my lack in mental energy to put it all on digital or physical paper.

So I decided to trust in how the story would present itself when I would be sitting in front of the listeners. Pfff…it went well and after my story the listeners shared in with their story. For now my Orchid of Life Agenda is empty. One of the reasons is an important life changing event in our personal lives as I mentioned at the start of this blog. 

My youngest is discovering his new self through school and especially the group processes involved. Recently he turned 4 years old and he started getting accustomed to school life. He just had his third week in a row. After his 5th morning at school he took out his little bear, wrapped a scarf around the bear and carried him around like a baby. He turned our house into his imaginary world in which he walked around with his bear. Hereby telling us the following: “He is 4 years old and he needs to be taken care of.”

That truly says it all!! Right?! Because this week the schools in the Netherlands were  striking, he only went to school one morning. This was his luck because he needed time to recover and integrate everything he learned. As of next week we will continue listening to his needs in this impactful phase in his life.

With Com-Passion,
Chungmei Cheng

HSP Coach & Rebirther


Our journey in finding the best education for our highly sensitive daughter

Our daughter is so happy summer holiday started. And especially that she will turn 8 this month. We’ve already celebrated her birthday with her friends from school. It was a mixture of friends from her current and her previous school. In her young school career she already got to know 3 schools.

Her first primary school (Montessori) was way too exhausting for her. She fell into a burnout. Her second school (private democratic system) was too unstructured for her. Her current school is part of Waldorf education. Regarding to structure and space for developing her creative skills they offer a right balance for her way of being and learning.

We have been through so much finding the right school for her. It has been a very emotional journey for my husband myself and our sweet and loving daughter. The right environment in which she can flourish as a person is essential to us, because we stand by one single conviction regarding children and education: children are perfect in and of itself.

They have come in our lives to teach us what we have forgotten: play, laughter, being in the moment, physical contact and having FUN while learning. They don’t need moulding and knowledge steered education, they need guidance to do what they have come here to share with all of us.

Speaking of going through emotional journeys in search of the right education for our children. Recently we met our new Brazilian neighbours who have come to the Netherlands for an indefinite period of time. They moved her from the South of Brazil for 3 main reasons: Waldorf related education for their children, safety and a healthier work/life balance.

When I listened to their story I felt myself tearing up from the inside. Their story radiated hope for the world. People who don’t have to move because of war, hunger, intolerance and oppression, but because they want to have their children grow up in an environment in which they can be the best version of themselves.

People are more conscious about what’s good for themselves and their environment and are acting upon it. And all these actions will mirror back to us the change we want to see in the world.


Stress: changing my fear into love

It’s autumn holiday in The Hague. We are very much enjoying the free time. I love to sleep in, eat when I feel like it and as a family we are reorganizing the house. Our project is to move into the biggest bedroom. This one was split in half with a wall in between when I was pregnant with our youngest. Now almost 21 months.

The sole purpose of this wall was to provide our children with their own space. Turns out our youngest had his own plan. He turned our plan upside down by sharing continuously that he didn’t want to sleep by himself. Because of his resistance we got into the benefits of co-sleeping again.

The big house change engineered new streams of positive energy through all rooms. Our daughter moved back to her original room and is very happy with more space and her privacy. We got ourselves a new (secondhand) closet and mattresses. We sleep on cheap light wooden beds and quite expensive mattresses filled with all kinds of natural material.

This morning we woke up to a new closet looking into the contents of it, because the doors are still waiting to be put in their place. We made it to Ikea for extra shelves and storage. Unfortunately the decision to accompany my partner caused a bit of stress. The hick-up was the time-frame. We should have left earlier for Ikea so that my daughter and I would have more time to arrive at our theatre performance.

Now I was emotionally challenged to change my fear into love. The fear of running late and missing the performance into love; telling our friends that we would be later and calling the theatre to ask if they would let us in. They would if we wouldn’t be more than fifteen minutes late. This meant we would be at least on time to see the whole lot of the performance. This helped me to get back into a loving state of mind. Luckily we were in our seats five minutes after the performance had started.

All together I felt stressed for only a few minutes. I’m happy everything turned out fine. But for a next time: I will listen and act upon my initial feeling of staying home with my daughter to have lunch. Afterwards we would cycle to the theatre and be there at least fifteen minutes aheads of time, because to me that is part of going to the theatre: taking time to enjoy my quality time with my daughter and absorb creative storytelling.

Yoga: a silent and inspiring place

As you may have already noticed: I started yoga last week. Although it’s only my second week of regular yoga practice I’m definitely reaping the benefits of it.

What I like about the classes I take at yogastudio Linggan is the studio I enter. From the moment I cross the threshold I’m surrounded by a happy and relaxing atmosphere. Linggan chose for a colour combination of fuchsia pink, black and white. This colour combination can be found on cushions, candles and flowers. They are located in city centre the Hague. Perhaps the atmosphere is better felt because of leaving the city center and entering an oasis of quietness.

Of course, experiencing the location as such, comes down to if one is able to open up for yoga as it is being teached. Some people still hear an occasional car or scooter driving by. Or people who clash their bags with ornaments against the window and feel disturbed by the noise. I hear the noise but I don’t feel disturbed. I’m very much concentrated on changing from one pose into another and keep breathing while doing this. By the way, breathing is what we do during the entire class.

I’ve noticed that the instructors from whom I’ve had class were very keen on breathing instructions. Because of this I’ve had some awesome classes. After class I felt cleansed from the inside out. (morning ashtanga vinyasa & evening hatha) There were also classes where I missed the breathing instructions as a continuous flow through the yoga poses. I believe it depends on the group of practitioners and the type of class. (afternoon gentle hatha & morning sivananda)

It’s a real challenge to keep doing the ujjayi breathing. This is a type of breathing while making a soft internal sonorous sound. This sound resonates from the throat to the heart on an inhalation, and from the heart to the throat on an exhalation. The ujjayi breathing warms up the body quickly and keeps the body warm.

When one gets familiar with the yoga poses and reaches a level of concentration and focus which are required to perform them than one starts experiencing the surroundings as it is meant to be. Than we enter a state of observation in stead of irritation. In this state of pure bliss we are connected with a higher consciousness. As I said before, this is only my second week, but I’m in!! In my silent and inspiring place, myself.

So are you practicing yoga? What does it bring you? If not, are you about to start yoga?

Did you find peace of mind?

“Did you find peace of mind?”, one of the participants during the training ‘A Fun Filled Life’ given on the 4th of November asked me this question. My answer was a whole heartedly ‘yes’. Yes, I found peace of mind after the birth of our daughter. Her presence brings us (me and my partner) back to the basics of life. I simply can not stress myself, because the attention has swifted from my wishes and ambitions to taking care of her. Of course I do have my ambitions, but I reach for them in a slower, more thoughtful pace. Yes, in other words, with peace of mind!!

And what is your story? Have you found peace of mind?

3 Tips on Finding balance after burn-out


Getting yourself into a burn-out by working hard is common knowledge. What isn’t, is that getting yourself out of the burn-out is hard work too. A possible definition of a burn-out is that you don’t feel mentally and physically strong to go about and handle your daily life. From the moment that you admit -with ‘you’ I refer to you and your body -that you are totally exhausted, the recovery starts by taking as much rest as possible. You need to catch up your sleeping hours and feel mentally and psychically rested to start taking charge of your life again by doing things step by step. And now comes the hard part!

The signals which got you in the burn-out are still there. You wish they weren’t, but unfortunately they are. The process of recovering of a burn-out takes time. The bodily signals I am speaking of, now pop up once in a while in stead of every day. The trick is to be overly conscious about these signals. For one that’s a typical headache and for another it’s aching eyes or stomach pain. Know your psychical signals, because they tell you a lot about ‘crossing mental and physical borders of your recovery’.

3 Tips on finding balance after burn-out

Recovery takes time
1. Know that it takes time to recover: you won’t get over a burn-out after a week of catching up sleep. A reason for this is that you are still the same person with the same ‘hard working-characteristics’. After a few days of working in the same way as you used to have, including being present at your social activities, the signals could return.

Listen & act upon your signals
2. Listen carefully to your signals. When physical pains start coming back again you should listen to them and ask yourself the following question: ‘How shall I take my rest?’ By taking a powernap on the couch, sit down and close my eyes, sleep for an hour, listen to music and so on. Anything which takes you out of the ‘thinking mode’ will help you to overcome the signals.

Setting priorities
3. The following question could be: ‘How did I get myself into this position again?’ Be as honest as possible in finding the answer to this question. The answers will get you back in balance & business! What also passes by as a learning point during the recovery process is that you learn to know what you are able to handle on a daily basis. Set your priorities and keep up with them. Don’t feel like a failure if you need to reset your priorities. That’s all part of the learning curve. Admit that your ambitions were a bit too high for the time being, but as soon as you feel healthy and in balance more (different) activities will be a part of your day.

The tips above will help you to create a healthy way of life. Some people like to take upon this challenge on their own and some know they would be happy with professional guidance. Changing habits need time. Habits are driven by the mind. And if you might feel any resistance or have any questions about what you think or feel during the recovery you can contact me.

Lifecoaching in action: make up your Balance Now!

How do you feel today? Do you eat a healthy diet? Do you exercise on a regular basis? For example: it could be that you are suffering  annoying pains, but you don’t take action to get your fysical state back to how it always has been, because of lack of time. Is it lack of time and all the deadlines you are facing or is it about setting priorities? My belief is that your health is the basis of everything what is going on in your life. Everything revolves arond YOU! And if you don’t feel up beat because of different reasons then it is time to do something about it. Be honest with yourself.

Do you make time for your beloved ones, the ones who give you energy? Do you have friends or relatives who sap your energy, every time you see them? As my partner and I are both ambitious people I often tell him that we need to see our dear family and friends on a regular basis. Because of our work schedule we have to give it some more time to balance our get-togethers with family and friends. Moreover, in case of family, they live all across Holland. Yes, Holland is a small country, but the travelling surely takes up time. Furthermore, be aware of spending time with people who affect your state of mind. Is it worth spending time with them? If they are, then it is best to keep your emotional distance. Act like a Buddha! People can spit their negative thougths, but know that these emotions are theirs to keep. If we are speaking about people who don’t actually mean a lot to us, then minimize the time you spend with them or when the relationship is too horrible, make up your mind about continuing the relationship.

Can you see yourself in the same career in five years’ time? If that thought makes you think of five long years of stress and boredom, it’s time to start researching a career change Will your current actions put you in the position you want to be in, or will they mean that you never progress from where you currently are? What you can do  when it comes down to choosing the career which will fit you best is to visualize, for example, at least 9 moments of pure happiness, and then translate these feelings to work related pillars such as people you work with, working conditions, working internationally, in contact with people or more a solitary function etc.

Are you thinking of additional education or are you already studying next to your full-time job?
Alternatively, are you taking on so many extra credit courses that you’re risking burn-out? In our society we all want more, better and it is also part of our status. But does it really make you happy? And if you really want to take additional courses or a Master Degree make it possible for yourself to lead a ‘normal’ life along the way! Keep seeing your friends, make time for love and enjoy the time you have. I often hear people saying that it only takes up 2 years of their life. Two full years of hard work and then what? The thing is that people forget that they live now. Everything is happening now, how are you able to postpone coming across the love of your life for example? It sounds like I am a dreamer, but I know first hand that it is possible. Recently I heard that someone decided to stop taking courses in his Master Degree. After one year of full-time working and studying he got tired of everything.

Something many people regret in life is not taking advantage of the chances that they have. Are you missing out on any opportunities at the moment? Imagine that you have your future-self looking back at the life you are leading right now and telling you to sign up for that course, take that class, reach out to that potential new friend, or volunteer for that big project at work? A good place to look for the opportunities you’re missing is to think about anything you’re afraid to try, or afraid to start. Those are the things that future-self wishes you would do!

By Chungmei Cheng
Lifecoach for Orchid of Life

1st day of SUMMER and last week before maternity leave


Summer arrived with the beautiful sunbeams shining on our balcony. Working from home has it’s benefits. One of them is to be able to lounge in a very comfortable chair. A chair in which you can sit/lay in three different positions. This is especially great because my babybelly is getting bigger and bigger. The only imaginable risk is that it is so comfortable that I could fall asleep. If it was not for my everlasting drive to be busy with coachingactivities I would fall asleep and then lounging wouldn’t be an option. Fortunately I can work and live through the day because of these sunny powerbreaks.

With this beautiful first summer day my last week before maternity leave started as well. My last week, hmmm? Nooo, that’s not possible! There are a few things I would like to finish. Since being pregnant and all I fail on concentration and focus. Does this irritate me? Well, to a certain extent, yes: it’s keeping me busy. I WANT to WORK and finish what I started, but nature calls a lot lately. When I have energy, I work. When I need rest, I take my rest. It’s like a constant communication with my body. Which is good. As a coach I would advise everyone (yes everyone, including the men!:-)) to get pregnant at least once in your life. The process will draw your attention to your body which definitely leads to a more healthy balance between mind and body.

And how come I can live with not finishing my project? Guess once!! Because there is a much BIGGER thing waiting for me/us! Our baby, our first child. How is that for a change? No projects, nor coachingsessions to deal with, but the biggest ‘project’ in life for which I don’t have any experience. Allright, does it count that I have changed diapers of my little brother? Don’t think so. From next week on I will take a deep dive into a neverending babyworld. Will go with the flow!

Am I living the perfect life as a lifecoach?

Jaua Brasil 2009

Are you leading the perfect life as a lifecoach? I was asked this question recently by a French girl. Clever girl! People have asked me this question many times. I understand this completely. I am dealing with peoples lives. If I would be unhappy with my own life this would lead to negative and low energy. So this is why I not lead the perfect life, but strive to lead a mentally and psychically healthy life.

So back to the question. To be able to answer the question, you need to first define what ‘perfect’ is for you and for me.

For some the word ‘perfect’ could be described as in..

..doing the work that you love,
..being with the love of your life,
…living in the house and city that you adore,
..driving a car, own several bikes (or other vehicles),
..having peaceful relationships with everyone around you,
..being in peace with yourself all the time, in good health, blessed with family and children,
..going on a holiday at least 3 times a year,
..being able to do all the sports you like and so on!

Focus and work on aspects which are important to you! And then you can say with true conviction that you lead the perfect life. Remember, less is more! Well, I can definitely say that I am leading the PERFECT life with only focussing on a few aspects of this list! So may I now continue my work as a lifecoach? 😉

And what about you? Are you working towards the perfect life or already living it?